Memo to My Children

From: Mum
To: My Children
Date: Tuesday 30th October 2007

Re: Taking Sick Days on a Tuesday

This memo is a request to my school aged children that you pleeeeaaaassseee do not choose Tuesdays as a sick day.

My reasons are as follows:

* If you are sick on a Tuesday (this applies only if you are BOTH sick) then my little baby has to take the bus to kindy all on his own. :-( And 3 is MUCH too young to be going on a school bus on your own. I know he's almost 4 BUT that's still too young!!!! Okay, I know he had a huge smile on his face and didn't seem the least bit perturbed at the idea..... BUT HE'S MY BABY!!!!!! Waaaaahhhhhh........

* Tuesday is my "home alone" day. I figure if I have to suffer through the torment of waving goodbye to my BABY then I should at least have a nice quiet morning to look forward to. You know I love having you around but well, the thing is, the point of being home alone is to be, well....home. ALONE.

* I've paid good money for those music lessons and if you miss them well.... I still have to PAY. For NOTHING.... And well, no one likes paying for something they don't get.

* You miss library day and the library will send me nasty notices about those books you found under your bed that you borrowed last TERM...... plus we'll get to tomorrow and you'll be saying "we need to BUY more books mum cos there's nothing to read".

If you really *have* to fall sick on a Tuesday, could you please:

* Choose a Tuesday when your father isn't about to disappear into the vortex of harvest, leaving me as a single mother for who knows how many weeks.

* Choose a Tuesday on which your mother has actually had some SLEEP on the Monday night prior to.

* Co-ordinate with one another so that there is only 1 of you home at a time. At least that way there'll be half the whining and zero fighting (unless you've actually figured out a way to fight with yourselves - which is entirely probable).

* Learn to drive so that you can make yourselves useful by picking your father up from the paddock. At least that way I wouldn't have to do it!!!

* Make sure you're sick enough to lie on the couch SLEEPING.

* Not knock 65 times on the bathroom door while I'm trying to shower in PEACE. Sheesh.... how much can really go wrong in a teeny, tiny few minutes?????

* Not ask me every 5 minutes when the computer will be free. There is only room for 1 internet addict in this family and the position has been TAKEN!!!!!

Failure to adhere to the guidelines set out in this memo may result in wages pocket money being docked. Yes I know that half the time I forget to even give you pocket money but you do realise that only makes it EASIER to remember not to pay you?????? That doesn't make sense? It doesn't HAVE to make sense! Why? Cos I'm the MUM, that's why!!!!



Love you heaps,



Love Mum xxxxxxxxxxoooooooooo (yes, you really do have to give me that many kisses and hugs. After all, I am your MOTHER!!!!!)